Will I lose weight with Intuitive Eating?
If you’re wondering this- no shade. I’ve been here too. I can remember thinking I would try Intuitive Eating (IE) because it might help me lose weight.
Now that I’m on the other side of my eating disorder struggles, I realize how backa$$ crazy this is- but at the time I didn’t.
This question goes right back to the previous blog’s question: Can you work on weight loss and find food freedom at the same time? It’s a valid question because it really highlights where your mindset is at.
Personally, I never found much comfort in the standard answers I got from online:
“It’s possible to lose weight when you do IE.”
“Some people lose weight, and some people gain weight while doing IE.”
“Only time will tell, try to focus on your relationship with your body and food instead.”
I can even feel the discomfort in my body right now as I write those answers. I imagine if you’re reading this and have this question in mind- you might be feeling the same way.
The discomfort I mentioned is important. I know, I know- I hate sitting with it too. Easier to just ignore it or stuff it down. Unfortunately, that’s what got us hooked into this eating disorder in the first place- so let’s just keep an open mind.
The discomfort I felt was about letting go of my belief that all that all my problems and all the things I felt were wrong with me, would be solved by weight loss. This belief was so seductive and reinforced everywhere I turned.
I pictured myself in one year, weighing my goal weight, and just lounging on the beach carefree. I was laughing and drinking a Mai Tai with an umbrella in it. I was wearing a string bikini and soaking up the rays. I had no worries, had a positive attitude about everything, and I was super outgoing. This was my fantasy.
It never occurred to me that I could achieve any of these things without losing weight. For some reason losing weight was the key to obtaining all this. It was non-negotiable. A fact.
I didn’t stop to even question how I thought losing weight would suddenly rid me of some of my very basic character traits like anxious temperament and being more introverted- it just made sense. Weight loss was the answer to whatever the question was.
So, yes, I was willing to do IE, but only if it meant weight loss. I could even have been persuaded to do IE if my weight stayed the same- but only on the days when my relationship with food brought me to the dark, low places.
Wrestling with the Belief that Weight Loss is the Answer
The discomfort about considering that IE could vastly improve my relationship to food, my body, and to movement but could also lead to weight gain was visceral. It was like a pit in my stomach that wouldn’t go away.
Did I really want to let go of the belief that had sustained me for so long? That everything would be ok as long as I lost weight. I wasn’t sure but the seed had been planted- maybe my belief was wrong, which was something I had never considered before.
I sat with this discomfort for a very long time. I was stagnant between both options: weight loss vs intuitive eating. At the time I was confused by the length of time this tool. Now, looking back I realize it had to take a long time because I was really questioning the way I saw the world. Perceptions like this don’t shift overnight.
Slowly I would return to my fantasy and ask myself if it was possible to feel carefree at a beach right now in this very moment- not when I lost weight- but now. I tried it- and I could. I also tried it again- and couldn’t. If I was in the same body both times and had different results with feeling carefree, maybe it wasn’t just based on my body? Maybe there was more to it?
This question in of itself was uncomfortable to me- so again I sat suspended in the discomfort. This line of questioning allowed me to turn my focus from looking outward, to looking inward. I began to answer my questions more based on how I felt and less on what I thought. This shift is what I attribute to my healing.
So back to the original question of this blog: Wil you lose weight with intuitive eating? The honest answer is that I don’t know. Is it still worth doing intuitive eating even if it means you gain weight? I also can’t answer that question for you. These are not easy questions and there aren’t any easy answers.
What I can tell you is to trust yourself. Give yourself the gift of not rushing this process and really sitting with the thoughts and feelings that come up. They will guide you to the decision that makes sense for you. This is the work- and it’s yours and on your timeline.
