Fall and Body Image
What is it about the change of seasons that tends to bring up body image issues? I’m not sure if this is just a me thing, or if other people also experience it, but without fail, as summer slips into fall, my unhelpful ED voice likes to make an appearance.
This voice mostly creeps up as I walk around TJ Maxx and see all the new autumn clothes:
“That would look so good on you, once you lose some weight.”
“Those flats are so cute, but you really need to wear heels to look slimmer.”
“Sure, that pumpkin latte sounds good, but you should make sure it’s skim milk and a small.”
It doesn’t seem to matter where I am in my recovery, this little critical voice returns year after year. Despite its consistency, I get surprised every year by it. Why does this happen? I blame fashion.
Fashion and Body Image
Fall is an exciting time, and I can’t help but get caught up in it. It’s the crispness of the air, the return to cozy sweaters, and the natural slowing down. Soon we are bombarded by limited edition everything pumpkin. I simply can’t resist this. It’s the pumpkin muffins, pumpkin bagels, pumpkin ice-cream, pumpkin cereal, pumpkin coffee, pumpkin candles, pumpkin pasta, etc.
Then comes fall fashion. I love the layered look, tights, cardigans, boots, and orange hues. I find myself getting excited to hunt for a few fall finds! I check out all my favorite clothing websites, scroll Instagram, and update my clothing subscriptions.
As my excited search turns into purchasing items, a gloom sets in. I start to narrow down my decision and my perspective becomes more critical. I notice that many of the models wearing the clothes I like are all thin. I start to question if the corduroy skirt I like will look good on me? The description says the model is 5’9 and wearing a size small- that’s not my body type.
What is Fashion Actually Selling?
I don’t want to be cynical because things have been changing in the fashion world. Some of the clothing websites I check out have a variety of bodies represented, which was not the case too long ago. These are great changes and represent progress.
Unfortunately, many of the fall fashion trends are still being modeled by very thin individuals. The more I look at various outfits, the more I realize what I’m wanting to buy is thinness. I can’t separate the two. It’s impossible for my mind to look at an outfit modeled by someone thin and not translate it as an outfit that would look good on me, once I’m thinner.
This realization really gave me pause. I thought about looking at the exact same outfit modeled by a person who meets society’s warped sense of beauty and a person that looks more like me, would I find the outfit equally appealing on both people? I hated to admit it, but I wouldn’t. I would believe the outfit on the person in the smaller body looks nicer than the outfit on the person whose body was more like mine. Shit.
Internalized Fat-phobia
The marketing world has done its job- it has managed to sell me the belief that my body is not beautiful the way it is, and I must change it. They sold me fat-phobia and not only did I buy it, but I internalized it so I can sell it to other people- for free! How did this happen?
I think it’s a matter of conditioning. It’s what capitalism and patriarchy has taught us is beauty. This means we can stop our conditioning and change it to what we think is beauty. I’m sure you’ve heard this advice before:
· Follow a variety of body sizes on your Instagram.
· Shop from stores that are size inclusive and have bodies well represented with their models.
· Expose yourself to a diversity of beauty to reteach your brain what beauty is.
This is sound advice and has helped me tremendously. Why not use this advice for my fall body image issue?
I will make sure to be extra mindful during each season change that I am using the three suggestions listed above. I’ll do some prep work to make a list of clothing stores that carry clothes I like, with prices I can afford, and practice body diversity with their models.
I can also make sure to be extra kind to myself during these season transitions so that I am offering my critical voice compassion and understanding.
Can you relate to this article? If so, and you’re ready to fully embrace the fall season without the critical eating disorder voice, then I’d love to hear from you.
